humourmob/horse car

oooooooooooo
SO YOU HEAR KITU KAMA EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
ETI oscar/horse car PISTOL WHIPPED PISTO/l/rius BROKE DOWN in court…………………
kwa hivyo after hiyo aliendaje home?????????????????????????????????????????????????????
ali-chukuliwa na (gari ya)Break Down??????????????????????????????????????????

pissed off pissed/orius
why didnt the match fixers @ fifa match the GUNNER(s)pissed orius & his pissed all/pistol and so lange kickboxer??????????????????????
solange THE OWL knOWLes big eyed hawkeyed fighter jet,fast moving lift??????????fast kicking pissed owl night owl knowles,,,,,,,,,,, would kick both the gun and the door TO HEll CRAZY IN WAR
ACHANA NA KARATE KID,nature should ave matched horsecar with lie la ali/laila ALI…………………
THEN THERE WOULD HAVE BEEN A RUMBLE IN THE BATHROOM(RUMBLE IN THE JUNGLE) YA CONGO TUACHIE GORILLA
PISTOLIUS AND FIST OF FURY
PIGIA ME
HE’D BE BLED RUNNER BY THE TIME LAILA IS THRU WITH HIM ,NOT BLADE RUNNER THE BLADES WILL BE
????????
WHAT IF NATURE MATCHED ‘IM WITH SIN THIA CYNTHIA ROTHROCK????????????????????????
SI ATAKULA KARATE CHOPS FOR BREAKFAST?????????????????????????????

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gone sinner/john sinner/CENA AKA THE MARINE

HUMOURmob/pro-fake/phesy

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SOMEtime back we lost mr.ROBIN williams.
like he was lost?????????????
he hanged himself??????????????
pity he wasn’t a piece of cloth to hang out and dry…………………………..

THEN WE LOST JOAN RIVERS
she wasn’t lost either.
she checked herself into a clinic.ENT CLINIC.FOR A FINAL CHECK
DOC did a biopsy………………….and so much more.
she came full of life…………………………….and she left breathless.and she was not left running
DOC was taking a selfie with patient under anaesthesia.
then next neurosurgeons will take a selfie of your brain.esp if you are very endowed in your field.at this rate a doc will switch peep’s brains in future.or doc ????????????????
actually……………………..they do take pics of the brain and call them CITY SCANS./scanner ya jiji
eeeeeehhh!
C.T.SCAN?????????
YOU THOught a bio-psy was a biography of that gang-nam stlye-d psy????????????????? i do.
it’s a procedure.a health procedure.
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
FAKE PROFAKESY predicts next comica to get lost or die trying is kevin hart(s)coz of the N in the first name and coz of the S in the second name.and calvin(g) harris.the N and the S.any one with the N and the S.
speculation and porojo provided by robi((N),joa(N)
and william(S),river(S)
THESE two are DOCS who gave the best medicine.LAUGH TER is the best medicine.ONA NA UCHEKE!

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THIS HUT IS CALLED KEVIN HUT

HUMOURITA/ THE witches coven/sorcerers na wanawake wachawi

1.MUNGU ATAKUPA A BRIGHT FUTURE,VERY BRIGHT YOU WILL NEED SUN-GLASSES TO EVEN LOOK AT IT.EMEN.
2.FORWARD PEKEE NDIO GEAR YENYE MUNGU AKO NAYO ON HIS GEAR SHIFT. He only moves ahead.with you.if you choose Him
3.LIVE while you are still alive and don’t die until you are dead
4.Appreciate the gifts of GOD to you.
5.DON’T LET THE DEVIL/THE ENEMY DICTATE YOUR ATTITUDE FOR YOU.GET A TRANSFUSION FROM THE BLOOD OF THE CROSS.DAMU YA YESU.YOU NEED A DIVINE TRANSFUSION for COMFORT AND BLESSINGS EMEN.
FROM HEBREWS::::::::::::::::WHOSOEVER cometh to the LORD must believe that HE is and that HE is a rewarder of those who dilligently SEEK HIM.
UMEKUWA UKITAFUTA MUNGU KWA MIAKA MINGI KISHA MUNGU AKA KUPA MAJIBU NA SHETANI MWENYE WIVU AKA FANYA KITU ILI UPOTEZE MAANA HAWATAKI KUONA UMEINULIWA
MUNGU ATAKUINUA BY FORCE::::::::::::::::::::::::DANIEL CHAPTER 4:35
INASEMA:::::::::::::::::::HE LOOKS ON THE PEOPLE OF THE EARTH AS NOTHING;ANGELS IN HEAVEN AND PEOPLE ON EARTH ARE UNDER HIS CONTROL.
NO ONE AND REPEAT NO ONE CAN OPPOSE HIS WILL
OR QUESTION WHAT HE DOES
(NEBUCHADNEZZAR LEARNT THIS IN A VERY COW-RY AND BULL-ISH WAY/THE HARD WAY)DO YOU HAVE TO BE AN ANIMAL TO KNOW GOD AND HIS POWER AND MIGHT??????????????????????????????????????????
OR FALL INTO HIS HANDS LIKE PHARAOH TO KNOW WHAT GOD CAN DO???????????????????
USITAKE KUONA MUNGU ANGRY BECAUSE UGAIDI ATA KUWACHILIA NI ZAIDI YA TERRORISTS WOTE UNAOWAJUA
UNAWEZA kuji kuta unaishi karibu na watu wachawi(SORCERERS na SORCERY ZAO HIZO)
# Watakutumia wanyama na vitu kama hizo pengine kama snails ili kuashiria kitu fulani wanachokifanya au wanachokufanyia.MUNGU ATAUA hao wote hizo viumbe vya giza wanazotumia na hakuna kitakacho kufanya.EMEN.
# Ukitoka nje ya unakoishi,,watatoka nyuma yako ni kama kwamba wana shughuli lakini shughuli yao ni kungoja kukuona au kuku-rushia ma roho machafu ya ki shetani wanazo miliki
#.HAITAKUPATA KAMA MTU WA MUNGU MAANA UMEFUNIKWA NA DAMU YA YESU NA MAPEPO WANAOGOPA JINA LA YESU NA DAMU YA YESU
watapata mshangao mkuu maana hawataona chochote kiki-kufanya.
NO WEAPON FORMED AGAINST YOU SHALL PROSPER
#.UKIZOEA KWENDA DUKA MOJA FULANI wachawi hawa wanaenda pia kwa hiyo duka( angalau) wanadhani mwenye duka awaambie/awape info. vile unavyo endelea maana hawezi kukupata.ataenda kwa pahali unanunua hata mboga ili kuulizia mambo yako huko,,,atashikana na mtu akija kukufanyia chores za nyumba ili anatafuta siku zote kukurushia ma roho za evil spirits na mwisho wa hii bidii yote ni kwamba anaambulia patupu maana MUNGU NI MWEREVU NA MIRADI NA MIPANGO YAKO YOTE IKO KWA MIKONO YA MUNGU NA MCHAWI HATAWAHI CHUKUA BARAKA ZAKO ZILIZO-KO KWA MIKONO YA MUNGU MKUU.
#.anarushia watoto wa majirani ma-roho ya wizi ili watoto vijana wa watu wasipate future mzuri.na wazazi wahangaike na kilio.
#.anarushia watoto ma -roho ili wasipite mitihani shuleni.na magonjwa kwa watoto.na hata kuua watoto wa majirani.
#.anataka ashikilie kila sector ya maisha ya watu na ku control maisha ya watu.kama ma pepo wanafukuzwa NA wanaenda na yeye afukuzwe katika jina la YESU,na u sorcery wake umwangamize yeye mwenyewe na ukoo wake.MUNGU anajua sana kuwachilia HUKUMU juu ya wamama wachawi kama hawa.na BIBLIA INASEMA WANAWAKE WACHAWI WASIISHI.MAY GOD UPROOT THEM FROM THE EARTH
#.WAtakurushia upofu usijue wanachofanya lakini MUNGU mwerevu mwenye haki atakuwa mwangaza wako na utaona na ufanye mambo yako yote because your steps are ordered by the LORD.na hata kama ni kusoma na kuandika……………MUNGU ATAKUFUNZA BRAILLE YA YESU IKUFAIDI HADI AKUFUNGUE MACHO UPATE KUONA.MUNGU YUKO ILI KUKUJULIA HALI NA KU COME IN IFIKAPO MAMBO KUWA MAGUMU
#.WATatumia mfanyi kazi au mtu unakaa nayo kurusha ma roho na satanic things kwa nyumba yako unapo toka.uzuri ni kwamba ukimjua MUNGU yote hiyo inawarudia vichwani mwao katika JINA LA YESU.(PSALM 91: THE LORD GOD YOUR PROTECTOR)
# Watafanya karamu zao za ki shetani ili wakuite na jamii yako huku wakijua wataviweka uchawi wao huo kwa maji na vyakula vyao vya giza na sacrifices wanaofanyia demons na ma shetani IF you pick up snakes or drink any poison you will not be harmed,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,UTAJUA siri za MUNGU BABA na atakufunulia na akuweke salama na hila za waovu siku zote za maisha yako.
#.ukienda zako utarudi upate wamepangana nje ya malango ili kuku angalia vizuri kama uligeuka ukawa na wazimu vile walivyopanga,,,,,,na hawataona ukiwa na wazimu.na badala yake hao wenyewe ndio watageuka wenda wazimu wakingojea ugeuke mad.they go mad waiting IN VAIN for you to go mad
#.watakuambia eti utaona.UKWELI NI::::::::::
HAUTAONA.CHOCHOTE LOLOTE.UTAONA INSTEAD MADIRISHA YA MBINGUNI IKIKUMWAGIA WEWE WINGI WA KILA AINA YA VITU VIZURI NA MUNGU HATAWACHA WADUDU WAHARIBU MIMEA NA MAZAO YAKO.NA UTAKUWA NA KILA KITU NA VIJAE VINGI NA VIKOSE MAHALI PA KUWEKA.na wachawi na wenye hila na wanawake wachawi watapigwa upofu na kupotea kwa nia na njia zao za giza.watu wataona tofauti kati ya kitendo kinachotendekea mwenye haki/righteous na THE WICKED.ONLY WITH YOUR EYES SHALL YOU LOOK AND SEE THE REWARD OF THE WICKED.na mazuri yatakayo ku-pata wewe mwenye kutumikia MUNGU na yule ambaye hamtumikii MUNGU .
EMEN
# ukienda zako utarudi unapata wameweka mkusanyiko nje wanakuangalia na butwaa ni kama kwamba wameona ghost.ni mshangao kwa sababu no matter what watakurushia na kuku fanyia,,,,,itagonga mwamba.haitakupata kamwe.ITACHOMEKA NA MOTO WA KUTOKA JUU MBINGUNI.kisha wanabaki wakikuangalia na macho ya shetani.macho ya uchungu.UKWELI NI HAWAWEZI IBA AU KUHARIBU BARAKA ZAKO NA NIA ZA MUNGU MAISHANI MWAKO ni kwa SABABU MUNGU AMEFICHA VITU HIVYO JUU MBINGUNI.mbali sana na hao.na pia akakuficha wewe pahali pa siri hawatakupata/hawatajua jinsi ya kukupata/hawatakuwa na la kuku fanyia tena ni kwa sababu MUNGU MWENYE NGUVU AMEKULINDA SAFE .
MUNGU awachanganyie kikombe cha machungu maradufu na mara saba na awape wanywe.na MUNGU anajua sana kuchanganya hiyo kazi.VENGEANCE IS UNTO THE LORD.ATAKULETEA MALAIKA WATAKUSHIKILIA NA MIKONO MIWILI NA UWE SAFE HATA WAKIKUONA WASIKUFIKIE.
WAtabaki na aibu kuu ni kwa sababu mbinu zao zote za ki shetani ni kama upepo na mvuke mbele za MUNGU MWENYE NGUVU.atazipeperusha na zipotee ukiona machoni pako.watabaki kuku tazama na huzuni na uchungu mkuu dhihirisho kwamba wameshindwa.na MUNGU NI MSHINDI SIKU ZOTE.HERI WEWE ULIO NDANI YA MUNGU.ATAKUSHINDANIA MAADUI WABAKI NA SHOCK NA HEART ATTACK NA WEWE UTAKULA MATAMU NA KUANDALIWA MEZA MACHONI PAI NA KUPAKWA MAFUTA NA KUKETISHWA MAHALI PA JUU.PSALMS 23.
WEWE KAMA MCHA MUNGU
1.BE ROOTED AND GROUNDED IN FAITH
2.LET THE ANOINTING TAKE YOU FURTHER
#.GOD KNOWS YOUR PAST,PRESENT AND FUTURE
#.GOD WORKS FROM THE END TOWARD THE BEGINNING
#.GOD HAS A WONDERFUL PRE-DESTINATION FOR YOU
#.KWA MUNGU kuna CHOICES,CONSEQUENCES NA REWARDS.
#.HE SCHEDULES THE BLESSINGS,REWARDS AND CONSEQUENCES.GOD’S JUSTICE WILL NOT ALLOW ANYONE TO CHEAT YOU AND WILL NOT ALLOW YOU TO CHEAT ANYBODY.
#.REWARDS HAVE BEEN SCHEDULED BY GOD.DON’T LOOK TO ANY MAN TO BE A/YOUR REWARDER
#.BUT FOR YOU who obey me(THE LORD ALMIGHTY) ,my saving power will rise on you like the sun and bring healing like the sun’s rays.you will be as free and happy as calves let out of a stall.(MALACHI 4:2)
WAcawi na watu wenye hila na giza wana dhani kuomba MUNGU wa kweli ni competition.GOD IS SPIRIT AND THOSE WHO WORSHIP HIM MUST WORSHIP HIM IN SPIRIT AND IN TRUTH
SURELY GOD SHALL DELIVER YOU FROM THE SNARE OF THE FOWLER AND FROM THE PERILOUS PESTILENCE

HUMOURMOB/ads

ooooooooooooooooo VEE nas    eti moroccan argan hair????????????????
organ?????????????????IC????????????????
argan??????????????????????????????????
beautiful essence??????????????????vee- nas
dadas are from venas/venus,mafuta from???????????another planet?????????????????
use vee nas with protein oils???????????next????????????????
vee man SHAH atengeze natural oil from pure corn to ??????????????
oooooooooooo
kwani who will make a hair product and say use this with UGLY EST essence??????????????????????????????????????????????
hakuna
oooooooooooooooooo eti the secret to heavenly african hair
most afro centric styles are really rather hellish
hellish means denrele edun hellish.big on nothing.it is a DEMON stration of nostylegia/nostalgia za mila fulani za kale!but most of ma nywele nowadays ni hell on earth.dirty,long-ish,smelly,weavy?????wavy??????????????curly?????????????kali na weaves za smell kali,
HELE!
ni hellon ana style hizo styles?????????????????????????????????????
THE HELL-IGOLAND NYWELES

pi2pic10389349_683617915062227_3983700995083880221_nJABER

th

CONCILIA

eti reigning German champions
raining?
reigning????????
kwani waligeuka mvua?????????????????

humour………….moB/advisory

ADVISORY WA PREZZO:AMIGOS MIGORI/GORY SCENESANKA10
so miye kama mja aaaaa eeeeee sio mja luo but aaaaaaaaaaa mja kazi like mi nasema kurudi MAN Uhuru  arudi a MIGO s/migory
but…………………..aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa…………arudi na kitu kama beamer ya afya.
sio BIMA ya afya ki health insurance but mi na say BEAMER YA YA AFYA
ni BMW
.wa jaca wanapenda vitu kama iyo beamer na imagine wangapi watafurahia kuwa sick ndio wapande beamer waende hosi???????????????????????????ni u-jaluo jeury
hawaezi rusha vitu na kuna ma hot beamers za ku-admire
eeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrr net wachia key errrrrr MBU/ki-er-MBU/as in wachana nayo home tu.
then wape rekee TABLETS
sio TABLETS ZA MA DAWA noooooooooooooooooooooooooo
TABLET TABLET……………….TABLET???????????????????????????????????????TECHNO????????????????????
ki NO-KIA??????????????????????????ni u=JA luo ina waua tu!
KISHA NEXT travel advisory ni tembea MUHURU BAY.m UHURU BAY!
note m-UHURU bay??????????????????apo ni nyumbani tu.DALA
KARIBIA M-UHURU BAY
na beamer ya afya.

 

QUESTION
*WHAT language does a computer mouse speak?????????????????????????
XHOSA au khoisan??????????????????
ni Xhosa.they click

*ni vizuri ku vumbua /gundua vitu na nimegundua eti septic tank ako na aunty na huyo shangazi ya septic tank si ana-itwa ANTI-sep-tic????????????????
si KUNA DAWA !

humourmob/MWANASIASA

KWANI hiyo pesa ni ya mama yako???????????????
kwani ni za BARBER yako??????????????????????????????
ni za mashine ya nani/mashinani???????????????????????????????????????ATM YA NANI? ……………………………….. SSSSSSSSOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
ILE STORY YA OOOOOOOOOO PESA SIO ZA BABA YAKO And other kadhaa lika……………………………………………………ukwweli ni kwamba the DUAL..E person should not have ongelelea hovyo hivyo.hata actually………………………….hangesema ivyo.kabisa hangeuliza hivyo……………..
coz!!!!!!!
the only M-KENYA ange thubutu anywhere kuuliza hiyo query ni only the fee leap guy.aka fee lip moi.ni philip moi pekee yake anafaa aulize hiyo query coz ule osanna PLUNDER MOI/roho sana plunder moi??????rosanna plu(n)da anamsitaki eti oooooooooooo up-keep………….toa pesa,angusha ma-thou………..style ya ja-LANGO with the money???????????NO???????????
na fee leap(he leaps over the ku-lipa yaani ha tacky kulipa……………………………
SI ni philip moi ndio anafaa aulize roho sana plunder moi eti hiyo pesa ni ya baba yako???????????????????
coz kweli n’kwamba hiyo pesa si ni ya baba yake?????????????
si ni baba yake philip o ako apo kwa pesa??????????????????
au hiyo ni sura ya mama roho sana plunder moi????????????????????????????????????????????
noooooooo.hapana.hata philipo asipokuwa accountable/accountMEZA…………………………MEZA WEMBE coz ni pesa ya baba yake na uta do???????????
THE MOI PAY- QUARTET starring:philipi silipi can’t pay won’t pay moi
:roho sana plunder moi,D.J.MORE
:arap boy moi
a gal moi,,,gallup moi,bei girly moi
upkeep kama ma phone numbers ndio wanadai,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,na wana die philip in the process ,,,,,,,as in wanamuua na hizo stori za pesa,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
na philipo aka angusha ngoma mpya yenye mwafrika haja sikia……………..
eti son wa african president ako bank-rupt????????????????????????
theyre s’posed to own /milk/miliki ma banks?????????????????????
as in hizo pesa ni za baba yao………………….
sio za why titu/waititu
but??????????????????????M
Mwisho wa yote teaser,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,kumi is ni,,, there is no romance without finance
uliza may the grace na gideon (N)gono??!